andrew's funny

Me to Andrew:
 "Daddy is my husband!
Grandma is my mommy!
Judah is my son!
Lala is my sister!"

Andrew:
"Lala is MY sister!"

Me:
"No, Lala is your AUNT."

Andrew:
"Yeah, Lala is my bug."

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(Andrew hates having dirty hands, so one night this was our interaction.)

It's 8:30 and Andrew had been in bed for 30 minutes.

Andrew:
"I have a booger!!!! Mommy.... I have a BOOGER! MOMMY, I have a BOOOOOOGER! BOOOOOOOGERRRRRR!"

Me *in thought only*:
"Wipe it on your sheets like a normal boy!!!"

Andrew (now in tears):
"Booger on mine fingers!"

So I go up, wipe it off with a tissue, and he rolls over and falls right asleep. (!?!?!)

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After a particular incident where I lost my temper, Andrew turned to Rusty and said, "Mommy needs to go back to bed. Her is tired."