Know Your Limits

All I've ever wanted to be is a wife and a mother. This may come as a surprise to some who know me, because I am really, I mean really, not a "kid person". My voice is too harsh, I never liked barbies, I play too rough, and make age-inappropriate comments in front of children regularly.

Seven and a half years ago I got married. Five years ago we decided to start a family, and abandon my college degree plan, and just buy a whopping life insurance policy for Rusty (so that I could stay at home and be the Stepford Wife I had always planned on becoming). Four years ago our first baby was born. Two and a half years ago our second baby was born. Two months ago we decided to homeschool Andrew for pre-school. One day ago, I realized that I'm not cut out for any of it.

Oops.

Andrew, our oldest, is the brightest kid on the planet. He picks up on concepts fast, and has the attention span of a mensa member. So, if there is any child in the world that I should be able to homeschool, it's this kid. Rusty researched, purchased, and started a curriculum with Andrew while I was in Texas. When I got home Rusty caught me up and gave me my assignments. *By the way, Rusty is doing like 99% of it, and he has asked that I participate in a couple tiny ways.* I embarked on my first assignment of helping Andrew learn the concept of 'same v. different'. I thought, "Ok! Read the story about the rabbit and the tiger, ask the kid how the rabbit and tiger are the same, ask how they're different, brilliant Andrew will nail it, and we'll be done!"


Unfortunately it went more like this:

Me: *read the story that plainly lays out several descriptions of the two animals* "Okay, Andrew, tell me how the rabbit and the tiger are the same!"

Andrew: "uhhhhmmmm the tiger is fast and he chases the rabbit and the rabbit runs and the tiger wanted to catch him and the rabbit is fast and then yeah that's what happened when the tiger...." *this went on for a while before my patience wore out*

Me: No, not even close. Let's talk about what same and different mean. *I teach (surely with amazing clarity and grace) the meaning of same and different* Now Andrew, tell me how they are the same!

Andrew:  "uhhhhmmmm the tiger is fast and he chases the rabbit and the rabbit runs and the tiger wanted to catch him and the rabbit is fast and then yeah that's what happened when the tiger...."


Me: Yep! Sounds good! *check it off the list and move along*


Rusty witnessed my amazing teacherness in action and swiftly followed up by taking Andrew into the kitchen and pulling out a ton of silverware and teaching him the things that are the same, and the things that are different. Then, he pulled all the balls out of the toy-box and talked about how some are the same and some are different and why. This went on all over the house, and I began slowly to realize that this was the patience and sticktoitiveness that I lack completely.


While this brilliance was being laid out for Andrew, I was responsible for Judah, and he pooped on the floor.  


I've already completed my application for Phoenix Online University, because it's clear to me that Rusty belongs home with the children, and I belong in a job that requires lots of travel.