Resolve

It's a new year. "This is the time when motivated people are motivated to change, and non-motivated people are motivated to change by the people who are motivated." Ha! It's true. For some reason we've decided that January 1st is the time to start over. We all get excited by this idea because we keep failing to meet our own expectations of ourselves. So, like the rest of the world, I've spent some time thinking back on 2011. The year started off high as a kite. I spent most of the year that way. I had amazing friendships, I was hopeful in my marriage, my kids were still cute and healthy and only moderately disobedient. The year ended hard. I spent a lot of time sick or injured; and a handful of relationships fell to pieces.

I've spent the last couple of months throwing myself a pretty spectacular pity party. Complete with tears, involving people who shouldn't be involved, (so that I could hear from somebody else just how miserable my life had become) and disillusionment with God. What a party! I've always been a hostess at heart, and man, I can host a pity party.

What I've learned here, with a little bit of reflection, and some preaching that has really stepped all over my toes, is that I had esteemed the things of this world to the point that when they failed to meet my expectations I was devastated. I think that my level of disappointment showed just how high of a pedestal I had granted to these things. Each relationship that I lost has caused ripples in my life that wouldn't have been there had I not given them such a stage. Picture this: Relationships in proper perspective are like a person standing on level ground on the side of your pool. Relationships that are elevated beyond proper perspective are standing on diving boards of various heights. When these relationships fail, which they sometimes do, they do a cannonball into the pool of your life. The higher their diving board, the further the waves travel. The ripples reach further into your life. They travel beyond their respective sections. Well let me tell you, based on the ripples, I can tell you that the relationships that failed last year must have had skyscraper tall diving boards because the ripples keep showing up in areas where they do not belong.

Resolve. It means to come to a definite or earnest decision about. It also means to reduce by mental analysis. I've done some of both for this new year. I've broken down, by mental analysis, why it is that I'm unhappy with the way this last year wrapped up. I've also come to a definite or earnest decision about how to handle relationships for this coming year. Along with my insignificant resolutions about sugar intake, workout routines, and language (yikes!), I've decided to put God on my highest of high diving boards, and to get the rest of you off of them! The good thing about this resolution is that God won't ever do a cannonball into the pool. He stays perfectly on His pedestal. The waves in my life that I've mistaken for His failures are exclusively there because of the improper esteem I had given to the rest of the things that failed to meet my expectations.

So friends, put your floaties on. I'm hosting a pool party for the new year, and I want us all to do it right this time. I love you desperately.